Why are we all so busy?

quiet near stream

We’ all say it. We all feel it. “I’m so busy!”

We use it as an excuse. The opening to a rushed chat. The answer to ‘What have you been up to?’ But what is busy anyway? Why are we all so busy?

It seems we are striving for that pinnacle of success where happiness and confidence comes from showing how productive we are and how many responsibilities we can juggle.

The problem is, being busy is one thing, but there’s a fine line between being purposely productive and being frenzied and overwhelmed.

We are under the misconception that busyness equals success, that it serves as a type of reassurance that our lives are full. After all if you are busy it means your life is important and meaningful right?

Wrong.

This sort of busyness, full of overscheduling and overwhelm simply leaves us sapped of energy and drained unable to enjoy the life we are striving for.

We have goals for all aspects of our life; work, home, family, fitness, eating and life success and it seems that to achieve these goals we have to fill our lives with to do lists.

We aim for the magical work/life balance, as if once we walk the tightrope successfully life will be perfect.

I know from experience it’s not the case.

There is no such thing as balance.

I was trying to do it all. Be that supermum who looked like she had it all under control

The truth was I was always unbalanced, teetering dangerously on the edge of falling. I was working too much, worrying too much, and unplugged. The breaking point came when I realised the destination of my goals was far off in time and the life I was missing out on, was right here in front of me. Right here, right now.

So what changed?

I did.

I decided I no longer needed to prove myself to others and most importantly, I redefined my definition of success.

I asked myself what I was missing out on right now. And really that was all I needed to know.

I’m not saying it’s an easy process. It’s certainly not easy to stop the busyness of life when you ‘ve been living that way for so long. It becomes ingrained in you, it becomes who you are. Hell I still have times where I end up busy and overscheduled. But each time it is easier to recognise the symptoms and to pause and re-route. The more you become present in the moment, the more you see your real priorities.

What I do know is I don’t want to look back one day when I’m old and grey and only remember how busy I was. I want to remember life. The smells, the tastes, the sounds, the feelings. The simple joys.

 

life is what happens

 

 

Linking with Essentially Jess for IBOT