Last weekend a stampede Australia’s bloggers headed north to attend the 2013 ProBlogger training event on the Gold Coast. I was not one of them. I have toyed with the idea of going both last year and again this year and both times the hurdles of distance, finance and family responsibilities presented themselves. Now there would certainly be ways over these hurdles but to me they were also a kind of safety net. The safety net where I could catch myself so I didn’t have to put myself out of my comfort zone.
It seems I am not alone. Sonia over at Life, Love and Hiccups wrote a post yesterday about the reasons why she didn’t go to ProBlogger. Son, who is has an effervescent, lively persona on her blog was honest about how her anxiety of being in a room of strangers. And I feel much the same way.
I would have love to be able to push through my fears and walk into that room as I love meeting new people. I love listening to their stories, feeling their passion and enjoy a good laugh. But I am also more of a voyeur as such. I love to people watch. But that’s another story. Perhaps one day I will attend such an event. Many have said they felt the same way and then after going have had the most fabulous time.
I often put myself though this sort of panic before a social event. Even an event where I do know people. I’m sure it comes from somewhere deep within. Put me under hypnosis and I have no doubt my shy introverted persona stems from something experienced as a child that I have locked in a safe place in a hidden part of my mind.
It seems strange that I can be such a confident person in my abilities, my direction and what I want from life, yet when it comes to being in a room full of people I turn to a quivering mess. Confidence is a funny thing.
Perhaps it is all part of the journey and is something I will get better at?
I know I need to push myself and most of the time when I do, I end up having a great time. Knowing that a large percentage of people feel the same way helps, but doesn’t make it easier.
The strength and nerve to step outside of our comfort zone is something that can only come from within. A place of courage and confidence. And with everything it is a journey.
As for ProBlogger I will just have to live vicariously through other people’s blog posts and tweets!
Did you attend ProBlogger?
Are you confident yet, not so confident?